Lessons from apartment living

20 things I have learned from living in an apartment:

1) Noodles are flammable.
2) Never run the dishwasher without first running the garbage disposal.
3) Make sure everything near the bedroom windows is waterproof.
4) Don't hang things on the shower rod.
5) Top Ramen does mold. So does juice.
6) Milk tastes bad after it has expired.
7) You can drink out of bowls when there are no clean cups.
8) Utensils are overrated.
9) There is no such thing as a magic crumb-removal fairy. There may, however, be a plain old crumb fairy.
10) Grey is the new white when it comes to saving money on laundry loads.
11) You can iron on the floor. Just don't leave the iron on the carpet afterward.
12) Ice cream lasts longer when you don't eat it straight from the carton.
13) Frozen eggs are hard to bake with.
14) There is usually more hair in our shower drains than on our heads.
15) It is best to wipe out the oven cleaner before attempting to bake anything.
16) Not putting a bag in the garbage can makes it really hard to take out the trash.
17) Co-ed laundry rooms can get awkward.
18) Do not eat anything off the kitchen floor more than a day after cleaning checks.
19) People do strange things in their sleep.
20) Some people use a lot of toilet paper.